Mardy Bum

mardy n (dialect) a spoilt child. Also adj moody, sulky, whining.

Is it just me or does anyone else find themselves regressing into grumpy adolescence when staying in the parental home? Before I go any further, I should point out that I dearly love my parents; they've never been anything less than one hundred per cent supportive; they're fantastic grandparents and, over the years, have helped me out more times than I could possibly count. I realise that I'm incredibly lucky to have such wonderful parents and, in all honesty, I should not be sitting here writing this post. And yet, every time I spend more than a day or so in my childhood home, I begin to feel like a sulky teenager.

I am so completely intolerant that I begin to irritate myself! I find myself analysing the smallest things my parents do and inwardly seething. The way Mum prods her food slightly with her knife before cutting into it; the habit she has of not finishing sentences, leaving them hanging in the air with a "So...". The way Dad preaches the Gospel According To The Daily Mail and never wastes an opportunity to spread the word. Needless to say, I don't sit there and argue and rant and moan (as I may well have done in my teenage years). I bite my tongue and count down the days/hours until my escape.

I've tried to analyse why I feel the way I do and I think it all comes down to a loss of control. I am unable to live my life in the same way as I would in my own home. I am forced to adopt my parents' routines, to eat their food, live their lives. The independence I have enjoyed for more than twenty years is taken away and my destiny is once more in the hands of my parents. I dislike the person I become when I go back to Barnsley and every time I vow to try harder. Maybe next time it will work...


Mardy Bum - Arctic Monkeys (Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not, 2006)